So, you're finished. Talk to me about the record.
With this record, the goal was to say something personal. I don't want to say things like, "it's emo," or "it's a departure." It is emo and it is a departure. Sure. But more than anything else, this record is vulnerable. It's personal. It's me making sounds based on struggle. My last record was a series of stories, and this time, I didn't have room to tell stories about things I didn't understand anymore, because all that was there were the things I couldn't make up. In a way, this record was unavoidable. There was no trying this time -- it all just came out of me.
That said, I don't want to inflict too much of my own meaning on it for other people. I think it's more important for people to understand how, not why, I'm trying to show everyone what it's like to be me. What it's like to be inside my head. I'm putting some skin in the game -- this is real life. This is how I express myself. It's darker, more serious, more frustrated than anything I've ever done. So coloring it and forcing it into a box by using words -- it limits things. Dudes who had a hard time with Mars Hill might be like, there's a song about that for me here. Or some girl who went through a shitty divorce and grew up in the church and got turned upside down, she may understand what I'm saying.
Here's a good example: when I listened to the Gold album by Starflyer when it first came out, it was -- there was nothing on the cover of that record. there was no writing, it just had a bunch of crests. Pictures of symbols, wings coming out of shields, and it was gold on the cover. That's it. On he back it just said "written and performed, etc., all glory and power to our Lord" or whatever -- but when you listened to it, it had nothing to do with Jesus, you know? Or the color gold, or crests. The guy was just having a really hard time with a girl. I didn't know anything about him at the time, or what his angle was, and I just had my own experience with it. That's what I'm hoping to achieve here.
So far as actually constructing these feelings, making this record felt like… like discovering Atlantis and running out of air before you get to it, and having to go back. I saw what needed to happen and could hear everything, but I ran out of -- it got too hard. I had to go back. With my next record, I'll try again. I didn't want to burn my wings flying by the sun -- yet. I'm not ready for that. I want to keep them a little longer. I don't want to sound like, with this record that I gave up or anything, because that's not the case. I definitely didn't. But there's still more in me to figure out. Hopefully my next one will get even closer.
Every single thing in that record is in there for a reason. Music is easy to take for granted, but here -- each instrument, each moment is there for a reason. That, and I hope it helps somebody. That's it.